LOVE YOURSELF, SHOW HOW by Sasha Lessin, Ph.D.

» Posted by on Sep 26, 2012 in Love | 0 comments

LOVE YOURSELF, SHOW HOW by Sasha Lessin, Ph.D., Dean, School of Tantra




Prepare a love-nest and set aside several hours when you’re wide awake, without pressing business or concerns. Imagine you prepare to receive and give leisurely, sensitive, unstinting sexual delight to the most important person in your world. Make the boudoir you create warm and comfortable. Let it contain a stand-up mirror and a large hand-held mirror.


Provide sensual music, fragrances, flowers, snacks, sacraments, massage oil or lube and plenty of large, soft towels.


Make sure no phone, delivery person, computer or dropper-by can intrude on the space you create for your tryst with the exalted person you plan to honor. Dress in your sexiest clothes.


Then invite yourself in; you’re the guest, the most important lover you’ll ever have. You.


Turn on the music, relax, imbibe. Stand before the mirror and slowly take off each of your garments. Look at your body objectively.




Turn at different angles to the mirror; see yourself from several angles. Watch your whole body flow as you move. Focus in turn on head, torso, legs, then crown, hair, face, neck, chest, back, belly, hips, buttocks, thighs, knees, shins, hands, feet, toes (but save genitals) as you dance to the mirror. Pick up the hand mirror. See your reflection reflect on your body from every vantage.


Stand before your image.


Notice what you like most and least about your body, what you see about your health, your assets and your liabilities.


Note what you appreciate. Say aloud how you’ll improve.


Identify with your body. As body, say what’s difficult and what’s satisfying about serving as this soul’s soma. Say how you feel about the way your person reacts to you. What would you like her or him to value you for? What else would you like her or him to know?


Use both mirrors. Look in your orifices.


Focus on, then become your genitals, roleplay your genitals. As Genitals, how do you feel. How did you feel in the mirror examination? What, as Genitals, is your existence as your person’s genitals? What do you, as the voice of your body, want and need?


Invite the energy at each level of your body to join at your genitals to celebrate.


Say “Lam,” touch your rosebud with your hand and ask your Earthy essence to come to your genital shrine for joy.


Chant “Vam,” touch your genitals and invite your Sensual subself.


Say “Ram,” rub your belly and invite the spirit of your inner Strength to join the fun.


Say “Yam,” touch your heart and invoke your Romantic inner voice.


Say “Ham;” invite your sound-maker Singer self to be present as you make love to yourself.


Chant “Ooo,” rub your third eye (between your eyebrows) and summons your inner Visioner.


Make the sound “Mmm” and invite your Universal Consciousness to be present too.


Pleasure yourself slowly as you look in your own eyes in the mirror.


Tell yourself aloud how much you love making love to yourself. Say, “I love you dear, [your name].”


Affirm your deepest devotion as you orgasm.


Pleasure yourself slowly as you look in your own eyes in the mirror.





Do each of these exercises with break of at least an hour.


TURNS: Partner 1 observes; Partner 2 masturbates to orgasm while, if possible, looking in Partner 1’s eyes.


Partner 1 then touches and strokes Partner 2 the way Partner 2 touched herself or himself.


Partner 1 then masturbates to orgasm as Partner 2 watches, then pleasures Partner 1 as Partner 1 pleasured her/himself.


SAME TIME STROKING Variation 1: You and your partner gaze into each other’s eyes as you each touch yourselves sexually until each of you each climax.


SAME TIME STROKING Variation 2: You and partner touch each other anyplace but genitals, as you look into each other’s eyes masturbate until you each climax.


SAME TIME STROKING Variation 3: You and your partner simultaneously stroke each other to orgasm. Use touch techniques you learned when you watched each other and practiced in the “Turns” part of this training.




Gather four to six participants in a comfortable room with sensual music.

All of you masturbate at the same time as you let your eyes move from person-to-person. Lock eyes with someone else in the group. Hold eye-contact with that person as long as you and she or he choose. Add non-genital touch with this person as you each self-pleasure.


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